Courage: Hope vs Despair
Destruction and limitation are aspects of universal design. On the human level, it is this aspect of existence that is the generation of all suffering. When things we love (people, pets, ideas, objects, dreams) are destroyed or injured it produces suffering. When our creative expansive energies are stiffled or blocked, or our ability to manifest our internal intentions into the external world is overpowered, we encounter the suffering of limitation.
We cannot Love without Grief, and we cannot Grow without the pressure of opposition. These forces are constantly pushing against our will to expand and move forward with a plan, and often we lose much more than we win.
Courage is necessary to face our failures head on, and push forward against the resistence that obstacles cause. I used to believe Hope was about doubt vs faith but now I see those a different concepts entirely. Hope is the courage to risk loving life despite the eternal heart break of inevitable grief and loss.
These next two poems describe my experience with hope, despair and courage.
Bi-polar (Shadow, Despair, defeat)
Life for me is waking up everyday afraid of my own mind.
Fearing what pain I can inflict on myself unintentionally.
Sometimes I think sanity is a concept made by crazy people
In a despreate attempt to believe they’re not crazy.
People tell me that it will get better, that one day
if I work hard enough I will live happily
Fools they don’t understand, they don’t understand that
it’s the pressure and work that defeats me
Life is far more scarier than death, when you die
the light that blinds you shuts off and the world exists as it should be.
They say there is a reason to live but I haven’t found it
worse yet I haven’t found a reason to die either, its as if
my mind refuses to make a choice, forever stuck in conflict.
The hardest thing is seeing everyone happy and enjoying the suffering
Why can’t I smile that stunned ignorant smile and say I’m one of you?
Why can’t I surrender my mind to some other master and rid
myself of this fight? Take it if you want it I can part with it.
Gentle star that gives me hope, shed light on me
Fill me with the strength to go on in this, to make it right
End the wars and silence the parties, I’m done for today
I have thought on my own to much and the sickness is comming back
The smell is pungent and I can feel the suffication,
Can someone speak to me with the mouth of reason
Tell me that I’m alright, that I am making this world up
Lie to me if you have to, I no longer care about the details.
By Darryl (Daristotle) McMillan (Circa 2005-2006)
Death Of A Martyr (Light, Hope, Ego Death)
Among these eyes of mine does gleam
The sweet memories of a dream
Within the heart of my minds eye glows
Upon my face the cold wind blows
Within these fields of flowery blue
Is all the grass in covered dew
To these memories that belong to me
And to these paintings I can see
Walk in my mind with great desire.
Stay a while; sit by the fire.
The rose lays glowing above my head.
I realize now that I am Dead
I float off soft into the sky
And watch my angel mother cry
I grabb my chest and sobe away
And feel the freedom of this day
The stones of green above my grave
Reminds those that have been saved
That when a hero passes on.
One of natures children gone.
And now I live strong and proud
within my bed upon on a cloud
I dangle in the summer sun
I feel so gold and yellow young.
The pain of mine has been released
The anger gone and fear has ceased.
I look upon the blankets creased.
And Sigh the sigh of heritics Leased.
My tears of flowing fluid green
Compell the actors of this scene
To cry above the coffin made
and say goodbye with hours bade.
The swan thats swimming in my pond
has given to me a sacred bond.
upon this death I will dismay.
The happenings of my way.
Beneath these stars of glittering light
I see the maiden of the night
Telling me to have no fear
asking me to dry my tears
Upon these words my spirit rest.
Upon the angels firly breast.
I pass though these golden gates
A life of mystery for me awaits.
By Darryl (Daristotle) McMillan (Circa 2005-2006)
Yin/Yang Volume I (Character)
Creation and destruction are the two base energetic opposites out of which the entire universe of objects and space was created. Matter is the existential opposite of energy. The entire universe, all matter and all life, is a result of these two forces shaping and restricting reality.
This is a truth or natural Law, so likewise it is true that human beings are born with both creative energies(Light, Spirit, Love) and destructive energies (darkness, ego, malevolence).
When these energies are embodied, that is to say; when a person offers themselves as a vessel to recieve, store and activate them, they begin to literally transform, the person, their life and ultimately the physical reality around them. The following series of poems gives an embodied presentation of these archetypal rivals.
The Serpent (Shadow – Deception)
Crowned king the serpant laughs
His charm spoken through sharp teeth
Whistling a familiar tune one that changed their eyes
The man behind this mask takes freedom from life
Surrender is given to the crowned one
The king gives to them a sweet poison
Consumed from the yellow petals of warmth
With a song they are lead to the forest
The magician is skilled in his tricks
Silver blossoms smile in the moonlight
Mirroring reflections of a cunning master
Words spoken by the tongue of their king
Sweetness achieved from the hearts of the fallen
Those who gain from the glory of the wicked
Walk only as shadows in the footsteps of hate
When the poison is gone from their sweet leaf
What will they owe the king in his sheath
The crowned one smiles the time is now
I have lead thee, I have fed they
In my grace you’ll now feed me
And as the serpent devours his people
They wonder how they were lead astray
The had drank the poison so peacefully
And had never once pondered this day
by Darryl (Daristotle) McMillan (Circa 2005-2006)
Richer Be The Man (Light – Integrity
To the mirror I shall take myself
To the mirror the pressures will die
As I see into the flame inside me
And I feel the truth in my eye
Richer be the man not with gold in his pocket
But with freedom in his mind
For a man with gold might be quite bold
as to buy what he can afford
But the free est of minds with vigor and Pride
Can live on their own accord
For the bend at the end of the road that you mend
might straighten out in the end if you try
But the money you reap while losing all sleep
Will never buy back your life when you die
For what we call living is more than just giving
up all of your hopes and your dreams
For being free is so precious to me that
I’d turn down your money in streams
All your stealing and wheeling and two-timing dealing
Won’t pay of your debts at the end
But nothing so sweet that’ll lift up your feet
Like the love of a good hearted friend
by Darryl (Daristotle) McMillan (circa 2005-2006)
Hey there, I am glad you made it.
I thought it fitting to start this blog off with a look at the poetry of my past. From 2005-2006 I was in a very mixed placed inside myself, poetry was a way to get some of this energy out. I wrote around 50 poems during that time and I have been able to recover 32 of them. Yay me!
Some are long and some are short, some rhyme and some do not. I decide to start with what I call the’ yin/yang collection’ a collection of three light poems and three shadow poems. It gives a good glimpse into the ups and downs of my inner world. It also mirrors the universality of the dance of the eternal opposites; creation and destruction.
I am still deciding which 6 to make up the collection, but the first two will be posted soon. So keep obsessively refreshing your web browser to make sure you do not miss it. 🙂